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The Oklahoman printed the Youth LEAD story on April 30, 2013! We are overjoyed at the outcome of our first training and cannot wait to see where we go from here! The "Blue Sky" is the limit!!
YMCA, Local Partners to Launch Youth LEAD Diversity Program
“Youth LEAD
brings a unique cultural competency program to our community. This youth led
initiative empowers teens to communicate effectively about diverse and often
difficult topics. The teens use their skills to discuss highly charged issues
and foster friendships across differences as they implement service learning
projects”, said Shannon Presti, Director of Teen Leadership Initiatives for the
YMCA OF GREATER OKLAHOMA CITY.
Youth
LEAD Associate Director, Tabitha May-Tolum will train about 25 adult advisors and a diverse group of area high
school students to reflect upon
their values and beliefs, connect with
others across differences and act together
to address local and global change during a weekend retreat April 19-21st
at Casady School. Moving forward, Youth LEAD
communities will use the skills they are taught in the program to inspire and
mobilize youth leaders to transform fear, mistrust and polarization into social
cohesion and collaborative problem-solving.
The nonprofit organization, established in 2004, has seen
much success, according to Youth LEAD Executive Director Janet Penn, including
being featured as one of two promising U.S. youth practices in a major study by
Harvard’s Pluralism Project. The
study documents the growth of interfaith initiatives across the country and
considers the implications of America’s multi-religious reality for citizenship
and leadership today and in the future.
“The
Pluralism Project recognized Youth LEAD because of its authentic,
youth-leadership model (rather than just talking, they actually plan and
facilitate complex events) and their multi-year trainings that give teens
critical 21st century skills,” Penn said. “Unlike many programs or peace camps that bring youth together
for one encounter, Youth LEADers spend several years together, running their
own meetings and community service projects.”
The launch
of Youth LEAD in Oklahoma City will be the first step in making it a national
program. There is no cost for students
or schools to participate in Youth LEAD.
Students must commit to monthly meetings and a few weekend trainings per
year. For more information on Youth
LEAD, contact the Y’s Director of Teen Leadership Initiatives, Shannon Presti
at 405 297 7728 or spresti@ymcaokc.org.
April 19-21: Youth LEAD OKC Trainings @ Wing by Youth LEAD Online Associate Director Tabitha May-Tolub
Tabitha May-Tolub is the Associate Director of Youth LEAD -
Youth Leaders Engaging Across Differences. Youth LEAD, which is based near
Boston Massachusetts, inspires and mobilizes youth leaders to reflect upon
their values and beliefs, connect with others across differences and act
together to address local and global challenges.
Tabitha holds degrees in Psychology and Education from Clark
University and has been in the field of Youth Development for nearly 20 years.
She has received training in the areas of peer mediation, leadership
development, facilitation, dialogue facilitation, anti-bias and primary
prevention education.
Over the last ten years she has worked in public schools,
community-based programs and non-profit organizations specializing in youth
leadership development at the middle and high school levels.
Her goal is to help create a new generation of leaders with
strong character and exceptional communication skills by empowering youth to
strengthen their character and effect change in their communities.
She is here in Oklahoma this weekend to help
kick start Youth LEAD OKC in Partnership with the Cassidy School and The YMCA
of Oklahoma City. She would like to share a little bit more about her
organization and their thoughts on service with you today.
Tabitha's speech
Hello, Thank you all for giving
me a few minutes of your time today. I am thrilled to be here in Oklahoma City
for the first time. There is truly nothing I love more than a chance to explore
a new part of the world and I hope to be back many times after this to watch
Youth LEAD OKC grow.
So a little history . .
. Youth LEAD (Youth Leaders engaging across differences) started about 12 years
ago as Interfaith Action. An important organization, called ADL
(Anti-Defamation League) wondered (all great things start with wonder) what
would it be like to do interfaith work in a small very diverse suburb. Sharon,
MA (where Youth LEAD is based) has nine
churches, seven synagogues, houses the Islamic Center of New England, more than
160 Hindu families, as well as a growing number of scientologists, Bahia, Jain,
Buddhist, Christian Science families and more.). It is an
extraordinarily diverse population for a suburb.
The adults in charge of
this experiment quickly learned that the best way to try something new, and
have it be successful, is by pairing the experience of those over 18 with the
energy, enthusiasm and passion of those under 18. So that’s how we got started.
Two years ago we changed
our name to Youth LEAD. It became clear that our program could be used to open
up discussion around all forms of identity – not just faith. We also began
supporting amazing youth and adults around the country to do this work. We are
connected to programs in Staten Island NY, Orange County California, Jordan ,
urban and rural MA and now OKC. Which is just so cool!
Why does it work? . . .
This weekend kicks off the National Volunteer Week and Global Youth Service Days. Such an important week!
You may have noticed that those of us over the age of 18 still have not quite
managed to fix the many challenges that our planet faces. In fact some might
say . . . we have done a little more damage than good. As part of National
Volunteer Week, I advocate for service of any kind that is filled with heart and
hard work. We have so many bodies on this planet and so much to do that in some
ways I say – “Just do it”. Just get out there and get started and make the
world a better place.
However – there are some
problems that we just can’t seem to fix, no matter how hard we work. Those
issues always seem to stem from the things that are most important to us, the
pieces of our identity: race, religion, ethnicity, gender, ability and sexual
orientation. When it comes to the pieces of our world that are connected to our
identity, our fears, our mistrusts and the ways in which we are polarized get
in the way. Elbow grease just is not enough. We need to find a different way to
serve.
This is precisely how
Youth LEAD hopes to help. For us Service has three equally important parts.
The first is Reflection. Who are we? what do
we believe? what baggage and what narratives do we bring with us from our lives
and the lives of our families? How do these pieces of our identity form us and
inform us? This part is really important because unless we know who we are,
where we come from and how that supports and challenges the work we do in the
world, it is hard for us to move on from here.
The second part is
connection. We need the skills to be able to connect with others who hold very
different beliefs than us. Whose stories and experiences give us a very
different perspective on the world? If we only surround ourselves with people
who look like us, think like us and operate like us we never see the whole
picture. We are always missing pieces that are essential as we try to repair
the world.
The third is Action.
While the first two parts are critical, until all our reflecting and connecting
translates into action – it will never get us where we need to go. This Action
however needs to be intentional. We need to ask deep questions about what is
and is not working and think creatively about why and how to fix it. WE need to
take all the information learned in parts one and two and draft it into
organized, intentional work. Projects that have a clear vision, committee work
that honors product and process, meetings that are focused and where all voices
are heard and allowed.
It is our belief that if
all three of these parts are in place, our service takes on a whole new level
of excellence and we can begin to repair the way we communicate with each other
and the way we serve the world.
How do we begin to do
this? What skills do we need? We have developed what we call Foundation skills.
The great thing about these skills is we have seen over and over how using them
can transform our relationships and our community. The bad news, they are super
hard to put into practice in our daily lives. Those of us who hold them in the
fore front of our minds – still struggle. But like any other skill: riding a
bike, hitting a baseball, doing a cartwheel, they can be practiced and we can
get better.
We have 10 foundation
skills. And I would love to share them all with you today but due to time –
you’ll have to join Youth LEAD OKC for that. I asked the youth in Sharon which
four are most important to start with. That by the way is the secret to my
success. If I don’t know the answer, I ask someone under the age of 18. They
gave me these.
1. Be curious: Seek out people who are different from you and
who think differently than you do. Find
out their stories. Be the person who
reaches out to the people that no one else does and listens to their stories.
2. Be courageous – have the conversation: When difficulty, uncertainty, and
misunderstandings happen, don’t walk away but engage in conversation.
Especially when it is hard and uncomfortable, participate in the
conversation. Have the conversation
with the person whom you should – not with everyone else. Be the person who uses open communication
over back talking, complaining and gossip.
3. Practice deep listening:
Listen and seek understanding.
Give people a chance to finish talking before you respond and give
yourself a chance to finish listening before you respond. Enjoy and soak in
people’s words, even when they make you uncomfortable or when you
disagree. Be the person who listens,
who really hears others.
4. Value discomfort: Seek out discomfort. This is the one I am working on right now –
because I really don’t like public speaking but we know that being
uncomfortable is a clear sign that you and others around you are growing. Be the person who can move through the
discomfort to the other side.
Now, Don’t take my word
for it. Try it and see if you get a different response. Try it and see if you
begin to see the world in a different way. Try it and see if you are able to
begin to work with others who were previously very difficult to work with.
As I said in the
beginning . . . all great things begin with wonder. I wonder what the world would
be like if people began to ask different kinds of questions. I wonder what the
world would be like if we did more listening and less debating. I wonder what
the world would be like if we replaced judgment with curiosity. I wonder what
you all will do to change the world for the better.
Thank you for your time.
I hope I get the chance to talk more with some of you while I am on campus. Make it a great day!
April 19: Youth LEAD Mentors Module Training: Aim to be a consultant not a leader. Deep listening, empowering questioning
April 20: Youth LEAD Teen Communication Module Training
Who are we? what do we believe? what baggage and what narratives do we bring with us from our lives and the lives of our families? How do these pieces of our identity form us and inform us?
We need the skills to be able to connect with others who hold very different beliefs than us. Whose stories and experiences give us a very different perspective on the world?
The tragedy of humanity, does not lie in its misconception,
but rather in the lost courses, the screw ups” and the lonely. Born from love,
hate is learned. What you find when you visit the attic of your mind scares
you. We fake our smiles to hide the fragility of our past. People do NOT change
overnight. Do not despair; try not to focus on your failures. We are not meant
to go through life, we are meant to GROW through life. To make a lasting
impression one must affect and inspire the coming generation. The only way to
find out if you can trust someone is to trust them entirely. I believe that the
first step is to give everyone the right to a good and ample education.
Shouldn’t everyone be given opportunity to better progress their lives. Since every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
Do not pray for less
rain, but rather pray for a better umbrella. Ananya, Casady 8th Grader
April 21: Youth LEAD Teen Project Management Module Training Begin with a goal(essential question) that motivates everyone. Develop objectives (focus questions)
Develop connected, reflected activities for the objectives. Value the process even more than the product. Embrace failure and discomfort. Practice deep listening and clarifying questions. Set workable meetings with well defined agendas (goal, objectives, and activities.) Check your progress at implementing the core principles in the process to making your goals a reality.
About Feedback
Take
what you need, absorb it and use it to
become a better facilitator and person.
Take
what you don’t need and leave it by the side
of the road,
don’t carry it with you.
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